A few weeks ago I got an offer in the mail from one of the banks where I have a simple savings account. I don't have a lot of money in this account since I really only have this account to avoid paying any fees for using their change counting machine or getting gift cards when necessary. Anyway, this offer was to convert my account to a 50 Plus Senior Citizen account.
A. Senior. Citizen. Account.
I am not (yet) a geezer but will be one day so the next time I was in the branch with my cup full of change I asked about the account. They looked up my account, explained the deal (free safe deposit box, no fees, minimum balance of $6, free checks, free ATM, etc) and then said I could convert since I was close enough to meeting the age requirement (aka being a geezer). I thought a moment, swallowed my pride for the pursuit of cheapness and converted the account. It was an odd feeling (sort of like when you first drive a minivan and try to explain why a minivan is much more functional than a Mustang GT convertible) but it might be one of those growing up rights of passage that nobody ever tells you about.
On the way home I started mentally accepting that I am actually turning into a geezer but it was lunch time. I decided to grab a quick lunch so stopped at Wendy's and saw a little sign there explaining their senior citizen program. I, of course, had to read the rules and got upset that the program kicks in at 55!
Which is worse: opening a geezer account or being upset that I couldn't get a coffee for a quarter? I don't even drink coffee! Soon I'll be driving a Mercury Grand Marquis (instead of the Mustang or Minivan) or eating dinner at 4PM. Wonder what else is on the road to Geezerhood?