A few weeks ago I got an offer in the mail from one of the banks where I have a simple savings account. I don't have a lot of money in this account since I really only have this account to avoid paying any fees for using their change counting machine or getting gift cards when necessary. Anyway, this offer was to convert my account to a 50 Plus Senior Citizen account.
A. Senior. Citizen. Account.
I am not (yet) a geezer but will be one day so the next time I was in the branch with my cup full of change I asked about the account. They looked up my account, explained the deal (free safe deposit box, no fees, minimum balance of $6, free checks, free ATM, etc) and then said I could convert since I was close enough to meeting the age requirement (aka being a geezer). I thought a moment, swallowed my pride for the pursuit of cheapness and converted the account. It was an odd feeling (sort of like when you first drive a minivan and try to explain why a minivan is much more functional than a Mustang GT convertible) but it might be one of those growing up rights of passage that nobody ever tells you about.
On the way home I started mentally accepting that I am actually turning into a geezer but it was lunch time. I decided to grab a quick lunch so stopped at Wendy's and saw a little sign there explaining their senior citizen program. I, of course, had to read the rules and got upset that the program kicks in at 55!
Which is worse: opening a geezer account or being upset that I couldn't get a coffee for a quarter? I don't even drink coffee! Soon I'll be driving a Mercury Grand Marquis (instead of the Mustang or Minivan) or eating dinner at 4PM. Wonder what else is on the road to Geezerhood?
Wait - we can eat dinner at 4:00 PM? I amso looking forward to geezerhood!
Geezer is the new 30.
Plus all the geezers in my neighborhood drive Corvettes so giddyup!
As long as you could read the sign at Wendy's without putting on your bifocals it is all good.
(I don't even drink coffee....that cracked me up.)
"Which is worse: opening a geezer account or being upset that I couldn't get a coffee for a quarter? I don't even drink coffee!"
HAHAHAHAHAHAH That made me laugh out loud.
OMG, so funny, the coffee thing cracked me up! Geezer schmeezer. Age isn't in the numbers, it is in the head.
LMAO. I have been a card carrying member of AARP for 4 years now and I'm only 43 (I get a membership because of my husband). I will always let cheapness trump most anything:-)
Hmmm, since I already eat dinner at 4 pm I think I'm ready for geezerhood. But mark my words, I am NEVER driving a Grand Marquis!!
My friends all think im a geezer now...early dinners, bed by 9pm, up at 4am! Wonder if I can get that deal at my bank?
Dude, Wendy's? Hope you got the salad (-:
You know, look on the bright side, soon you will get to tell a whole new generation how you use to drive these things called cars to school... uphill... in the snow... both ways. "We didn't have these fancy spacecrafts, or faster than light drives."
Think of all the cool things you do NOW, compared to when you were younger!
(I am telling myself that as '45' looms at the end of this month)
We are improving with age like fine wine :)
your as old as you feel/act. HAHAHAHA Jeff is concerned about your diet . Love it. way to chime in homie.
Have you gotten a prescription for a colonoscopy yet? That usually comes early in geezerdom.
Can you buy me a coffee when you get to 55? This way you will be doing something good.
You know...some of those "adults only" communities do look kinda nice, and quiet, and no kids running around...I'm just sayin'
What's the bicycle equivalent of a Grand Marquis? An adult tricycle? :)
25 cent coffees for us all!
LMAO at the Grand Marquis. My dad and my gfather both have/had one.
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