Friday, April 16, 2010

At the gym

I lived a charmed life especially as it comes to work out venues. Until recently with my injuries, I haven't been to a gym in years. The closest I got to a gym was going to the aquatic center to swim from time to time but last year we got an endless pool at home so even that was becoming less frequent. I also used to be a regular at spin class (until I started doing most of my indoor cycle workouts on the trainer/power meter in the basement instead) but the spin studio was just a back room off a karate dojo dedicated to spin so that didn't really count as a "gym."

This has changed recently. I'm still the new guy at work so I'm putting in a ton of hours. Since there is a gym onsite and I knew I would be tight on time, I joined up. I have been successful in being able to zoom down to the gym if and when I get a hole in my schedule. I also had the some new experiences of going to the hot yoga studio. The main thing that is new to me is dealing with the other folks that are supposingly working out.

When I go to the gym, I have my workout plan, just simply get the work done and leave. I am not there to gawk, I am not there to hang out. It might be due to how I work out but I do not view it as a social opportunity. In fact, if anything I'm antisocial. I don't want to spend a minute longer than necessary at the gym.

I have found, though, that I seem to be in the minority. I feel like a voyeur spotting these other folks but I've "observed" all of this in my short time while in the gym:
  • A 40 something year old guy who is a cross between Mario Batali and John Belushi as Samurai Yogadude thinking that he is 25 years old again and hitting on the high school girl showing everyone the new tattoo on her left boob while she solicits recommendations for her graduation present (you guessed it, a tattoo for her right boob - should it match or be complementary?).
  • The guy who probably has never sweated in his life (note that the standard gym issued uniform of cotton grey shirt/blue shorts show all upper body sweat immediately) hitting on the girl who is spinning up a storm on the stationary bike. In response, she stares off into space and raises the volume on her ipod. I try to estimate how long it will take him to sulk away. A new work record: 7 minutes!
  • The girl with enough bling on to compete in Mr.T look alike contest talking to the guy that looks like an oompa loompa due to a tanning session gone wrong. Actually, it must have been more than a session, perhaps a 20 pack. Neither, again, actually exercised.
Maybe I'm lucky but maybe this is the norm. In any event, I'm going to keep doing what I'm doing and hopefully my amusement will continue.

PS: There is hope for some outdoor training this week but the weather gods are threatening (yet again). I've got 5 hours in the saddle and doing it all in the rain will suck but I think it would still be better than doing it at the gym.

11 comments:

KC (my 140 point 6 mile journey) said...

i don't work out at a gym anymore, just go to the Y to swim and that's it so my crazy character run in's are minimal. however, when I used to go to bally's in the late 80's/early 90's, there were some folks there that I will never forget. like the pool guy, permanent belt man, the barbarian brothers, boss man, humpty dumpty, just shrugging it guy, just to name a few. I'll spare you the details on how they earned those nicknames. never knew their real names, never wanted to know. like you, I was there for one reason, workout and get the hell out. pure entertainment! hope your 5 hours in the saddle is mostly dry!

Big Clyde said...

This was funny. It also seems sad...I would just want to be left alone when I work out.

Good luck on your ride. I'm riding this weekend as well.

teacherwoman said...

I too like to get in, get my workout done, and get out. However, when I am sitting on the mat stretching and doing some other core work, I do like to people watch and usually it's the same people that make me want to shake my head in disgust. LOL

Lisa said...

bwahahahahahaha

At least you get a comedic reprieve at the gym...

Al's CL Reviews said...

My gym is gay central, so I'm not bothered.

But your observations are funny and true. In College, I couldn't figure out why the gals were there with full makeup. Seemed off to me.

Julie said...

Ha ha, very funny! I love to people watch at the gym too:) It is cheap entertainment! I hope that the weather Gods cooperate and that you are able to go outside for your bike ride:)

Tri Mommy said...

I'm generally amused when I go to the gym as well. Of course, I have on my don't mess with me face when I go too. I'm usually a very approachable person, unless I'm in the gym or at the airport. The two places I don't want to hear your life story!

Big Daddy Diesel said...

The gym provides high quality entertainment!!!!!

Jess said...

Watching other people at the gym does truly amaze me. I used to chat with some of the people in a spin class I took when I lived back in PA, but other than that I was pretty much zoned out working out.

Glaven Q. Heisenberg said...

You hit the nail on the head about gyms here, brother. I can't stand them!

People at gyms keep hitting on me 'cause I'm so purdy.

Patrick Mahoney said...

This post makes me very happy.